June 20, 2005...7:39 pm
“I’ve got guys, like, up my ass”
… so said the ho-bag behind Hawk at Max & Erma’s tonight.
She was very loud and very skanky and threw “like” into her sentences roughly every third word. I shit you not.
Hawk insists she was a “college kid” but he only heard her. I saw her. She was easily in her mid-twenties; she looked late-20s/early 30s by the face but she was what my mother would call “hard.” She was also ridiculously dressed in “urban” style sweats with something written across the tits and the ass and she was dripping with jewelry. Her friend she was with was practically silent; she had to be.
The gist of the conversation was thus:
I know like so many guys like and they’re always coming over and like sleeping on my couch. You know like Justin? The first time I was like With Him he like didn’t want to like go home and I was like “you have to go” like right? These guys I like say to them “What are you like interested in?” They’re all whatever and I say “Do you like like music? Are you into politics?” They don’t like say what they like.
At that point, Hawk leaned forward and said “I’m going to turn around and say, ‘They’re interested in pussy! Now shut the fuck up!’”
Oh if only…
So she goes on and on about how guys never leave her alone and the first time she was Together With this one or that one blah blah fuckity blah. I’m like “You’re a stereotypical slut. You’re a slut having a loud, one-sided conversation in a family restaurant about what a slut you are and as you walk out, people are going to laugh at you behind your back.”
And we weren’t the only ones who did.
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