September 21, 2005...9:53 am
Smell the Glove
Next time I see an Allstate ad, I’m saying:
“Bats, they are sick. I cannot hit curveball. Straightball I hit it very much. Curveball, bats are afraid. I ask Jobu to come, take fear from bats. I offer him cigar, rum. He will come.”
How did I not recognize him? I nearly peed my pants when I found this out… today!
Going now before I start quoting Major League any more…
“You tryin’ to say Jesus Christ couldn’t hit a curveball?”
“I play for the Indians.”
“Here in Cleveland? I didn’t know they still had a team!”
“Yup, we’ve got uniforms and everything, it’s really great!”“Hello. Do you know us? We’re a Major League Baseball team!”
“But since we haven’t won a pennant in over 30 years, nobody recognizes us - not even in our own home town.”The post-game show is brought to you by… Christ, I can’t find it. To hell with it.
“How would you like to manage the Indians this year?”
“Gee, I don’t know…”
“What do you mean, you don’t know? This is your chance to manage in the big leagues.”
“Let me get back to you, will ya, Charlie? I got a guy on the other line asking about some white walls.”“Heywood leads the league in most offensive categories, including nose hair. When this guy sneezes, he looks like a party favor.”
“Yo, bartender, Jobu needs a refill.”
“I thought you said we didn’t have any high priced talent.”
“Forget about Dorn, he’s just high priced.”
“Look at this fuckin’ guy.”
“My kinda team, Charlie, my kinda team.”
Tomorrow… Bull Durham.
2 Comments
September 21, 2005 at 11:22 am
mike just told me that was the same guy too, about two weeks ago. and he’s the president on 24. never ever would i have made the connection on my own.
i love that movie. love it. it is hilarious. my brother and husband used to coach 11 & 12 year old boys baseball, and the kids would always say, “forget the curveball, ricky, throw ‘em the heater!” awesome.
September 22, 2005 at 3:52 pm
You didn’t know? I knew b/c he was the president on 24. I realized that about 3 episodes into Season 1 of 24. And he’s said before that his favorite character he’s ever played was Cerano…
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